Trump Times Entry 183 – FBI Director Christie?

FBI Director Christie?

May 10, 2017

After firing FBI Director James Comey for not doing what the president wanted, the Donald is left with a decision: who to replace the maverick, Russian hating, Hillary loving Comey with? Sure, any other despot would have selected a replacement before purging that day’s opposition, but Trump’s not your traditional tyrant. The Donald prefers the “act now – damage control later” management technique, as taught at Trump University.

Comey brought in on himself of course.  Did he really think he could walk an ethical line with the Donald after crossing that line for the Donald? No James, all sales are final. Once your soul is under the Trump trademark you don’t own it – the Donald does. (Dumb ass!)

And really, what else could Trump do? He had hinted, loudly and clumsily, for over six months that all Russian stuff was fake news and the matter was closed. Nevertheless, Comey persisted. So, the Donald was forced to counter with a classic Trump tactic: when in doubt, fire someone.

Ever the showman, Trump added a twist to make it his own and explained that Comey had to go because he had treated Hillary unfairly. Then, In a flashy display of political acrobatics, the Donald concurrently criticized Comey for doing Hillary a favor by not prosecuting her.

Nice. The brazen, in our face, don’t care if sounds like bullshit lying we get from this conman remains breathtaking. Even after one-hundred-eighty-three of post-election repetition, the Trump narrative remains raw and fresh like new episodes of a really shitty soap opera.

But, fuck Comey he’s old news. (Unless he comes back as an Independent Prosecutor in a future episode. Who knows what our congressional comedy writers have in store?)

Instead, let’s briefly cover replacement. Could this finally be Chris Christie’s chance to join the Trump White House? Ever the bridesmaid, never the bride, Chris has been a Trump supporter for a long while and he’s been passed over time and time again. While some think Chris just lacks the required optics (Trump prefers good looking guys like himself), I think it’s more of a type casting problem.

The Donald requires sycophants that don’t look like sycophants. Sure, he prefers pretty ass-kissers, but mostly they must be capable of playing a pro-Trump public role while appearing independent. Unfortunately, Christie always looks like he’s sucking-up, even when he’s just enjoying a hug from a black president. Frankly, Chis looks too needy. (Plus, the Donald may never get over that hug.)

On the other hand, given the high death rate among Trump staff, the Donald may be hard-pressed to find any volunteers other than Chris. So, this may be the perfect storm that renders FBI Director Christie.

The republic would expect Chris to bring the same skills and ethics to the FBI that he featured in New Jersey. In a fractured, bombastic, divided administration, who better to build bridges than Governor Christie?

In Peace and Justice,