Trump Times Entry 224 – Trump Free Day

Trump Free Day

June 20, 2017

I don’t know about you, but I need a Trump free day. After two-hundred-twenty-four continuous days of observing the Donald a break is in order.

Instead of words, today, Wet Dog Productions offers only this photo of my partner Larry – enjoying a quick daydream on this last day of Spring 2017.

Larry doesn’t care about politics, money of world domination. He cares about food, sleep and affection. The republic could learn from Larry.


Trump Times Entry 223 – Huston, We Have a Problem

Huston, We Have a Problem

June 19, 2017

Trolling, don’t do it, but when done well appreciate it.

Last week, a creative group of trolls scheduled an interesting event in Huston, Texas. The event’s purpose was ostensibly to pressure the city into taking down a memorial statue of Texas hero Sam Huston. Using a Facebook page and event features, they promised to bring together the largest demonstration ever to force Confederate statue removal. They promised to be just like the New Orleans demos last month, but bigger.

The organizers were even a little provocative – suggesting that fascists better not show up, for fear of getting their butts kicked.

So, of course, a “This is Texas” organization formed and invited 3%ers, Oath Keepers, Militias, Tea Partiers and all other alt-right theater troupes to counter-demonstrate. You know, to show those communists they can’t push Texas around.

On game day, hundreds of alt-righters showed up in costume, wearing InfoWars jackets, military camo, cowboy hats and lots of leather – waving Confederate flags and “Stand with Sam” signs. Ready for a fight.

They even organized a forty-person-deep armed security team to secure the area.

Imagine their disappointment when no one from the left showed up to fight with. The whole thing was a fake. There were no libtards to yell at, no demands to tear down the Sam Huston statue had been made. Since there was no one to fight, they paraded around in their costumes, brandishing their guns – demanding the city keep up statue it had no plans of taking down.

Perhaps, had they cracked a history book (or Googled it), they would have become suspicious – since Sam Houston had actually refused to swear allegiance to the Confederacy when the state seceded from the Union in 1861. Houston opposed the Confederacy – dumb asses.

Well, hope they had a nice outing in the 90 degree Houston heat.

Americans have been hiding behind costumes, pretending to be something there’re not for much longer than the two-hundred-twenty-three days since the election of the pretender Trump. And the republic respects every citizen’s right to dress up and play hero. Though Comic-Con sounds like more fun, with decidedly more credible characters.

May the Farce Be with You,

Trump Times Entry 222 – Peace Ambassador Ted Nugent

Peace Ambassador Ted Nugent

June 18, 2017

Here we are two-hundred-twenty-two days after electing to change to the Donald. And most the change observed so far has been the unintended sort. Mercifully, none of Trump’s “big-ticket” items have come to fruition: Muslim travel ban – unconstitutional, wall – no funding, kill Obamacare – too complicated, America great again – any day now. But, other unexpected phenomena have manifested.

Let’s see, a left leaning guy tried to shoot up a group for Republican politicians. This is unusual in that up until now shooters tended to be politically hard-right (or just mentally ill). And, typically, they haven’t been very fussy about their victim’s politics. This guy was a Bernie follower (who ultimately supported for Jill Stein) that went crazy and channeled the lone gunman myth – like so many conservatives before him, but targeted conservatives.

Then, Ted Nugent, the guy who suggested that Obama “Suck his machine gun”, was so touched by the notion of crazy white guys, from the political left, shooting at Republicans that he had an epiphany, became a new man. He publicly vowed to stop the hate speech. Ted even reached out to liberals stating, “We have got to be civil to each other”.

The debate about whether Ted’s change of heart is genuine or just a coward’s reaction to liberals shooting back is current raging online. But, in either case, Ted’s shutting up will be appreciated.

Unfortunately, Bill Maher, who is recovering from his own word-malfunction problems, was so impressed with Ted’s announcement that he invited Ted onto his show – to start the dialog. Shit, just when Nugent’s about to shut up – some, “well-intentioned” liberal invites him to speak. What could go wrong?

I thought Maher was smarter than this; giving conspiracy theorists a “legitimate” speaking platform tends to backfire. Just look at the NBC, Megyn Kelly, Alex Jones fiasco.

Alex Jones is threatening Kelly and NBC with releasing tapes he secretly recorded of conversations with Megyn. For his silence, he’s demanding control over how NBC broadcasts his formal interview with Megyn on Sunday. Apparently, Alex doesn’t think he’s going to like the way NBC edited the interview, so he’s using a, no doubt creatively edited, tape of his own as leverage to control the narrative.

Ironically, NBC may be the only party surprised by Alex’s sleazy move. What a bunch of idiots.

The republic expects our media professionals to be smarter than our con-men; guess that’s our bad. (Idiots!)

In Pace and Justice,

Trump Times Entry 221 – Ye Ol’ Snowflakes

Ye Ol’ Snowflakes

June 17, 2017

Is this Honors English? Cause there’s sure a lot of Shakespearean drama.

First, we have a new ruler casting pronouncements into the void, ignoring the advice of counselors and family while blundering toward self-fulfillment as emperor. The story unfolds with narrative both tragic and comedic – through short, but intentionally vague, soliloquies.

And then, we have Shakespeare in the park.

Yeah, the alt-right was recently offended by a New York Public Theater’s presentation of Julius Caesar. The production’s costumes were contemporary and the title character, Caesar, was cast and dressed to look like the Donald. (You’d think he’d be honored, cast as the greatest general ever.)

Apparently, they take issue with the third act, where Caesar get stabbed to death by all his political buddies. So, a couple alt-righters disrupted a performance: one rushing the stage and renouncing the “normalization of political violence against the right” and the other calling everyone in attendance “Nazis” from his seat.

Both were escorted out by fit looking young men. Theater within theater.

Wow, the bunch that brought us eight years of hate Obama memes, lynching enactments and the “I Hate Hillary – Just for Fun” Facebook page are upset with casting a Trump lookalike to take the fall in act three of a four-hundred-year-old play?

Really? The play didn’t represent Caesar as evil. The story wasn’t even really about him; he’s not even on stage for over half. And in the end, the Caesar faction wins. Hmm.

Perhaps I’m overthinking it. Maybe the alt-right people didn’t read or, maybe, understand the play. Perhaps they can’t see anything other than the death scene. Perhaps, the alt-righters just doesn’t want to watch their hero struck down by the hand of political predators. In that’s the case, they’ll probably need to turn off the news.

It’s mid-June, two-hundred-twenty-one days since the election and too politically hot to suffer snowflakes. Toughen up,the republic expects the narrative to progress from Shakespeare to Poe before the story’s over.

In Peace and Justice,

Trump Times Entry 220 – Russian Buyer’s Remorse

Russian Buyer’s Remorse

June 16, 2017

As the investigations into Team Trump heat up, an unexpected source of insider information has begun to emerge. Seems a Russian lobbyist just contradicted Jeff Sessions’ recent testimony about meeting with foreign contacts. Apparently, our Attorney General had a couple meetings with that lobbyist, but, while under oath, forgot to mention the liaisons to the Senate. The Russian representative noted that those meetings with Sessions were also attend by a few other Republican foreign policy guys.

Ah yes, the recurring Russians-Republican theme continues – this time asserted by the Russians. Interesting.

It was also interesting that recently Putin offered political asylum to James Comey. Comparing Comey to Edward Snowden, Putin said he saw no difference and would be happy to grant the former FBI director political asylum if things got too tough for him in the USA. While most feel Putin wasn’t serious, and no one expects a Boy Scout like Comey to run to Russia, the tone of the message was clearly anti-Trump. Interesting.

I may be grasping at straws here and reading too much into things, but wouldn’t it be delightful if the Russians decided to cut their losses in betting on Trump and joined the witch hunt? After all, they aren’t going to get their primary objective: sanctions lifted. Congress just passed a bill to prevent Trump from lifting or even easing the Obama era sanctions.

So, the big prize is off the table, but Russia did get some benefit from their cyber-attack: disruption of the American political system and the election of a weak stupid leader, the Donald. Not too bad for a few month’s covert work.

But now, Trump’s value is waning and may be too expensive to maintain. Plus, he just won’t shut up, which makes him dangerous.

Just sayin’.

We appreciate that Trump’s election, two-hundred-twenty days ago, hasn’t been as helpful to Russia as expected. And the republic understands Russia’s desire for a clean breakup. So, comrades, if you could share what you know about the Donald, we’ll take from here.

Na Zdorovie,

Trump Times Entry 219 – Catch and Release Witch Hunt

Catch and Release Witch Hunt

June 15, 2017

Let the games begin. Please!

So, the Donald, the guy who criticized Obama for tipping his hand, tipped his hand revealing his idea to, maybe, fire FBI special counsel, Robert Mueller. After all, firing the last FBI guy did slow things down a bit – so, it was a partial victory. And, perhaps, if the Donald keeps firing people, eventually he might fire the right one and end this unfair, fake, witch hunt (and rid the DOJ of many many witch hunters).

The response to Trump’s “let’s fire the next guy” pitch was, pretty much, negative. Sure, the Trump orthodox thought it was a great idea, because it came from the Donald, but their influence is only significant in election years. All other voices, both pro-Trump and anti, suggested that another firing would be a bad idea. The optics would be too similar to Tricky-Dicky Nixon and the constitutional questions raised, too uncertain. Shit could go very wrong.

And that’s why I can’t imagine the Donald doing anything other than fire Mueller – or, least try to fire him.

Trump isn’t into inconvenient conventions and brings a certain emotional element to the presidency. Yup, one morning he’s going to wake up, angry and frustrated about Melania turning him down two-hundred-nineteen consecutive nights since the election, and decide to tweet a “You’re Fired!!” to Mueller.

At which point the courts and congress would, hopefully, be compelled to action. Maybe…

Given the marshmallow majority in congress, it may take a few more firings, lawsuits or, even, shootings before they catch on – until they figure out the Donald is too expensive. But, given Trump’s winning personality, in all probability they’ll get there and impeach.

Yeah, big fucking deal!

So, best case, Trump gets driven from office – back into the private sector, where he can fall back to real estate scamming and laundering Russian mob money – and we get President Pence. Whose first executive action will be to pardon Trump.

Damn it! That bleeding heart “Catch and Release” (the white guy) policy is taking all the fun out of the witch hunt. Makes the republic sad.

(Yeah, I’m getting way ahead of things with these hashtags. Call me a hopeless romantic.)

In Peace and Justice,

Trump Times Entry 218 – Return Fire

Return Fire

June 14, 2017

As inevitable as death and taxes, the gun play was bound to blow back to the facilitators. For years, decades, the congress of these United States has actively ignored our gun problem. No mass shooting seemed outrageous enough to provoke legislative or even investigative action. A Democrat Rep shot while speaking – too bad, but what can we do? Gay partiers mowed down in Florida – oh well, the second amendment, you know. Multiple incidents in Santa Barbara – it’s so hard to find the right time to talk about such an emotional issue.

Even gunned down schoolchildren were not enough get congress off its collective ass to do anything other than offer fucking thoughts and prayers.

If anything, gun control has gotten weaker as congress lets control laws expire. I suspect our Republican legislators thought their constituents were the only one’s armed – so felt things were, relatively, safe – for them. (I don’t understand why they think that – no one checks political affiliation at point of purchase.)

And now someone is shooting at them – go figure.

After two-hundred-eighteen days of post-election Trump influence, most the shooting has been overseas. The republic fears that is about to change.

In Peace and Justice,

The Donald just tweeted his thought and prayers to the victims of this latest shooting. Is anyone else getting sick and tired of thoughts and prayers offered as substitutes for actions?