Huston, We Have a Problem

June 19, 2017

Trolling, don’t do it, but when done well appreciate it.

Last week, a creative group of trolls scheduled an interesting event in Huston, Texas. The event’s purpose was ostensibly to pressure the city into taking down a memorial statue of Texas hero Sam Huston. Using a Facebook page and event features, they promised to bring together the largest demonstration ever to force Confederate statue removal. They promised to be just like the New Orleans demos last month, but bigger.

The organizers were even a little provocative – suggesting that fascists better not show up, for fear of getting their butts kicked.

So, of course, a “This is Texas” organization formed and invited 3%ers, Oath Keepers, Militias, Tea Partiers and all other alt-right theater troupes to counter-demonstrate. You know, to show those communists they can’t push Texas around.

On game day, hundreds of alt-righters showed up in costume, wearing InfoWars jackets, military camo, cowboy hats and lots of leather – waving Confederate flags and “Stand with Sam” signs. Ready for a fight.

They even organized a forty-person-deep armed security team to secure the area.

Imagine their disappointment when no one from the left showed up to fight with. The whole thing was a fake. There were no libtards to yell at, no demands to tear down the Sam Huston statue had been made. Since there was no one to fight, they paraded around in their costumes, brandishing their guns – demanding the city keep up statue it had no plans of taking down.

Perhaps, had they cracked a history book (or Googled it), they would have become suspicious – since Sam Houston had actually refused to swear allegiance to the Confederacy when the state seceded from the Union in 1861. Houston opposed the Confederacy – dumb asses.

Well, hope they had a nice outing in the 90 degree Houston heat.

Americans have been hiding behind costumes, pretending to be something there’re not for much longer than the two-hundred-twenty-three days since the election of the pretender Trump. And the republic respects every citizen’s right to dress up and play hero. Though Comic-Con sounds like more fun, with decidedly more credible characters.

May the Farce Be with You,
osv