A Well-Armed Victory Lap
December 4, 2016
It’s been twenty-six days since the angry-white-right seized control of the slightly left, but mostly apathetic America. Kellyanne Conway’s whiny voice is droning in the background and doing holiday rituals as if everything were normal has become a national pastime. Though, the holiday shopping ritual has taken an odd turn.
If you are like many liberals, this year your holiday shopping list may include firearms. And I understand – every time I heard Kellyanne’s voice I, too, want to buy a bigger gun. Second amendment solutions seem appropriately visceral given the recent failures of intellect. Guns, America, feels right…
Back in blog “Trump Times 20 – Lock and Load” I mentioned that we libtards seemed to be getting kind of interested in guns. Well, we now have some numbers and while overall gun sales are down, sales are way up among minority purchasers. Before the election gun sales were to the usual customer base, but after the election there was a demographic shift.
Hmm… So, in terms of armed population groups here in the good old USA we now have:
1. The typically well-armed paranoid conservatives
2. The newly armed frightened non-conservatives
3. The seemingly freaked-out police forces
4. The most powerful military force in history
To keep life interesting, the Donald is taking a pre-inauguration victory lap in a whirlwind tour of the states he won. As a thank you, Trump is holding campaign style rallies complete with “Lock her up!” chanting liberally spiced with racist innuendo. What fun! (Bullies are rarely good sports.)
So, the Donald is stirring up groups 1 and 2. Which further freaks out group 3. While Group 4 stands ready, awaiting his orders. Kobayashi Maru.
Shit, this blog sure went to a dark place fast; I’m freaking myself out. Think I need break right here and do something distracting – perhaps that holiday shopping. I hear Gander Mountain has a sale on Rugers and Glocks – oh, look they have used Bushmasters! What a country!
While armed with more guns and less tolerance, the republic stands.
That’s all I got today. Take care of yourselves and each other,