Trump Times Entry 256 – Trump Free Sunday

Trump Free Sunday

July 23, 2017

We here at Wet Dog need a Trump free day. So, WTF, we’re taking one.

The dog days of summer are nearly here. So, instead, here’s a photo of Martha, this year’s World’s Ugliest Dog. I don’t know why they call her ugly. I think she’s beautiful and a good sight prettier than anything Donald related.

Shirley Zindler stretches the face of her dog Martha, a Neapolitan Mastiff, that went on to win this year’s World’s Ugliest Dog Competition in Petaluma, California, on June 23, 2017. Photo credit  JOSH EDELSON/AFP/Getty Images)

Eye of the Beholder,

Trump Times Entry 256 – Never Too Corrupt

Never Too Corrupt

July 22, 2017

Our feeling for today: irritated.

Everywhere we look, Trump is riddled in scandal. Just yesterday we heard the Russian ambassador verify that Jeff Session’s, our AG, lied to congress about Trump’s complicity with Putin.  And how about, that Trump real-estate used for money laundering investigation. In terms of tone setting, the Donald’s admitting to (bragging about) obstruction of justice didn’t help; nor the did optics of the president threatening private citizens.

Trump’s voter suppression agency, thinly veiled as the Voter Fraud Commission, was so over-the-top even Republican governors refused to cooperate. Never one to hesitate from eating one’s own, the Donald responded with, “If they don’t want to cooperate, what are they hiding?” Wow, it’s like he’s reading lines from old red bating Cold War propaganda – you know, from back when it was in style to troll Russia rather than American governors.

The Russia Probe has finally begun to follow the (Trump) money and, in response, the Donald ordered his highly paid research staff to Google “Presidential Pardons” – because he was curious. Yeah, he probably wants to pardon Hillary for not loving him enough.

And the Trump kids? Don’t get me going. Just like dad, Junior can’t keep his mouth shut and insists on spouting embarrassing, if not criminal, confessions; Donny doesn’t think soliciting Russian intelligence is a big deal and isn’t afraid to say so.

The son-in-law has had to amend his security paperwork three times because he forgot to include hundreds of things he and Russia have in common. I suppose it’s hard to keep things straight when you’re busy working on Middle-East peace, reinventing the government and converting all your assets to rubles.

I don’t know what the favored daughter is up to; frankly, by the time I get that far down my news feeds I’m ready to move on to YouTube dog videos or, maybe, Netflix.

Wow, I just realized, I’m guilty of not taking the woman as seriously as the male criminals! That’s probably a mistake; after the Trump gang blows up, after the last loyal has been sacrificed to protect the Donald and he’s forced to abdicate, in that historic moment – she may be the last man standing.  Shit!

With so much corruption where should we look? It’s hard following so many cartoon-like characters when they’re not so much entertaining as irritating.

Meanwhile, our Republican controlled congress is preparing to vote on a healthcare bill no one wants. The bill doesn’t have enough votes to pass and won’t solve the problem. But they don’t know what else to do.  So, they gonna hold a meaningless vote. Rearranging deck chairs on the Titanic, so to speak. Irritating…

Two-hundred-fifty-six day of post-election Trump, of course, has caused irritation. He’s like a diaper rash on the republic’s ass. It won’t go away until we remove his shit.

I offer no apology for any metaphor tortured today,

Trump Times Entry 255 – Pardons for Everyone Trump

Pardons for Everyone Trump

July 21, 2017

Today’s feeling is bleak.

While the Donald’s looking into his authority to grant pardons to friends, family and himself seems a hopeful sign – after all, innocent people don’t need pardons – talk of presidential pardons sends a chill.

We’ve been here before. Back in my misspent youth, we let a criminal president walk away free – the beneficiary of a presidential pardon. Back then Gerald Ford pardoned Nixon for anything he may have done. Tricky Dicky was never charged with anything; there was no point. Ford gave him a preemptive get out of jail free card.

And Trump has the same authority. True, Nixon didn’t pardon any of his staff, so a few of them went to jail, but Trump clearly lacks Nixon’s ethics – so who knows? It’s not hard to imagine the Donald handing out wholesale pardons, firing anyone who objects and then whining about how the press is so unfair to him.

Yeah, and congress will just stand around with that stupid look on its collective face. Paul Ryan mouthing, “Why would we challenge a fellow Republican?” keeps coming to mind.

And congress is the only real check on Trump. We need to scare them into action or, better yet, replace them. But replacing representatives is long-term. Shit, for now we’re left with fighting through the bleakness that Trump casts.

We’ve faced two-hundred-fifty-five days since Trump and his Russian overlord took the election and we will endure over five hundred more before we can legitimately dethrone this illegitimate president. Nevertheless, the republic will endure.

Back during that misspent youth, I frequently felt the assassin’s bullet was the only way to real change – so chose to look away, I’m no assassin. Since then, the years have moderated me, but not the reasons for those feelings.


Under Trump American justice is a myth,

Trump Times Entry 254 – The Art of the Threat

The Art of the Threat

July 20, 2017

Very unfair!

We really need to do a better job handling mental illness in the country. I know, no one wants to talk about it, it’s difficult to diagnose and treatment rarely leads to a cure. But ignoring the problem doesn’t make it go away. We need to face it, turning a blind eye to the troubled just makes things worse.

I mean, just look at the Donald.

For years, hell decades, we’ve watched him act out. We’ve heard him call people names as if he were a sugared-up eight-year-old; seen him mock disabled people then deny it ever happened; watched him claim credit for things he didn’t do and then sue the people who point that out. Time after time we’ve seen him deny demonstrable reality and then make up alternative facts.

Yet, we’ve ignored his obvious cries for help and treated him as if he were a just another obnoxious buffoon, a rich one, but still a harmless pathetic clown. I understand some people even find him entertaining – which I don’t understand.

Unfortunately, ignoring the Donald’s issues has encouraged other similarly troubled people to put him in power. So, now, while he’s still a buffoon, he’s no longer harmless. And his name calling, playground mocking self-indulgence has graduated to threats and crimes. (Though, I suspect crimes have been part of the Trump brand for a while now, we just felt he was more entertaining than threatening – so ignored it.)

For instance, in an interview last night with the New York Times, Trump publicly threatened Jeff Sessions, Robert Mueller, James Comey, FBI Director Andrew McCabe, and Deputy Attorney General Rod Rosenstein. He managed to hit five guys, all Justice Department people, in a fifty-minute interview.  And while some might call working so many threats into such a short performance art piece in-artful, there’s more.

Of particular interest was: Trump’s criticisms of Rosenstein, where the Donald implied the gentleman couldn’t be a real Republican because he was from Baltimore and Trump’s complaint that Sessions was extremely unfair to the president for not overseeing an investigation of himself. (Yeah, the Donald’s taken to referring to himself in the third person like a rapper – spooky.)

Crazy, hey?

So, we had our chance two-hundred-fifty-four days ago and blew it, elected the buffoon because he was the more interesting candidate and now it’s up to congress. Will they recognize his symptoms of mental decay? Will they realize that the Donald is a threat to himself and the republic? Will they do the sane thing and remove him from office and get him treatment?

And if not: well, we really need to do a better job handling mental illness in the country.

One flew east, one flew west, one flew over the cuckoo’s nest,

Call me a hopeless romantic, but I remain wistfully hopeful that a heart attack, stroke or aneurysm will solve the problem at hand. (Well, actually, I find those events more likely than congress doing the right thing. Batty, hey?)

Trump Times Entry 252 – It’s All Hillary’s Fault

It’s All Hillary’s Fault

July 19, 2017

Well, the Republicans couldn’t pass a Trumpcare bill so they thought, maybe, they’d just repeal Obamacare. Hell, the House passed repeal bills fifty times during the Obama administration. So, how hard could it be? Yeah, just cancel the AHA and let the chips (or bodies) fall where they may. That would teach those libtards a lesson and certainly the Dems would come crawling back and help pass a bipartisan tax break for the 1% once the body count got high enough.

But it turns out, it’s a lot harder to pass a law likely to kill Americans if the president is likely to sign it. So, we’re six months into the Trump regimen and the Republicans can’t seem to pass any significant legislation. Go figure?

Now, the latest plan is to let Obamacare blow up – or, maybe, make it blow up themselves. Of course, that may be just as difficult as plan A or B. Yeah, it’s tougher do stuff; so much easier to sit back and criticize.

Could it be that the Republicans are victims of “Be careful what you ask for; you might get it.”? I think it could, they seem to always be victims of something.

They can never catch a break; they finally get control of all three branches of government and, turns out, their president isn’t really all that conservative, has a bad case of Tourette’s, and is a Vladimir Putin fan boy. As a leader, he’s a tough guy to defend, even by the party that gave us Richard Nixon.

To make matters worse, the new guy goes and hires his family into the White House and, for known criminals, they’ve turned out to be pretty bad at hiding criminal activity. So, new scandals are appearing daily. Who would have guessed?

Even the Republican media organ, Fox News, has been critical of the Donald and the party. Once again, who would have guessed that Fox has some limit to the bullshit they would accept. Who would have guessed that it would take only six months for a new Republican administration to achieve that limit?

But, luckily, some Fox News staffers remain loyal and are cooking up a fix for all that ails Trump and the GOP. And it’s a tried and true method, a tactic that’s worked for years: blame Hillary. Hence, new stories are appearing charging Hillary with everything from being mean to Bernie to (no fucking kidding) colluding with Russia.

Yeah, as the Trump empire sways and the Republican brand takes on a decidedly old school fascist tone, the Fox faithful are trying to save the day by resurrecting an old, already dead, enemy. What a bunch of fucking lazy asshats.

While we’ve endured two-hundred-fifty-three post-election days of Trump propaganda, that term is nowhere close to the decades of bullshit we been fed regarding Clinton. The republic feels the Clinton as the devil narrative is all used up and respectfully requests that the Fox spin machine please dream up some other universal enemy to bate us with. For fuck-sake, earn your salaries and come up with a new phony story.

Boring fiction is just sad,

Trump Times Entry 251 – Why Are They So Bad at Healthcare?

Why Are They So Bad at Healthcare?

July 18, 2017

First off, the debate in the Senate and the “Healthcare” bill the House regurgitated last spring is about paying for healthcare – not healthcare itself.

A discussion about the act of caring for the population’s health, about how treatment is performed and how we are educated about taking care of ourselves is a discussion worth having. But, that’s not what the Senate is currently struggling with. Right now, it’s about the money – how will the bills will be paid and by whom.

And surprise – surprise, no one wants to pay, because it cost too much. We have an aging population, a national diet based on high fructose corn syrup and multimillionaire middle men all making our healthcare the highest priced on the planet. So, even those making a reasonable living, find the cost unreasonable.

On top of all that, the people now charged with fixing the system, Republicans, don’t believe the government should be involved in the “free market”. And healthcare to them is just another product, hence market magic only should be applied – without the interference and over-regulation of the government. Yet, we’re pressing them to participate in and take leadership of this thing they don’t believe in.

So, we get shitty results. When they make proposals that provide less service at higher consumer expense, but cost the government less (requiring less taxation – something Republicans love) they are earnestly surprised when we greet those ideas with disdain. From the truly conservative point of view the government doing less is always preferable. These are people who feel the government should maintain a military, police, print money and provide roads – and that’s it. (Hell, some conservatives feel that roads may be a bridge too far.)

So of course, they do a bad job; we’re asking them to do something they don’t want to do.

Over the last two-hundred-fifty-two days since the election the conservative congress has reluctantly attempted to replace Obamacare with something more to their liking. But, of course, they’ve not been successful since nothing is to their liking.

Hence, the Republic appreciated Mitch McConnell’s candor when, on Monday, he announced his intention to have a vote to repeal Obamacare without a replacement. Because, that’s what they really want.

If they can’t be humane, at least they should be honest.

Repeal all congressional benefits,

Trump Times Entry 250 – The Trump Doctrine: So what?

The Trump Doctrine: So what?

This photo make me happy.

July 17, 2017

The Donald refused to disclose his tax information during the campaign, but said he’d make good after the election. The election came and went, but no tax disclosure, the Trump explanation: who cares, so what?

Remember when Trump labeled Obama “the vacationer-in-chief” and accused Barack of playing more golf than Tiger Woods? Yup, the Donald assured us back then he’d never take cushy vacations on the taxpayer’s dime. Nevertheless, so far, Trump’s golfed 37 times at a tax payer cost of about 17 million bucks. But the presidential press secretary tells us Trump’s golfing is strategic – so, so what?

Back on the campaign trail, Trump vowed not to cut Medicaid. But both his proposed voodoo budget and the Republican ACA replacement bill do just that. Obviously, he and Paul Ryan could really use a win, so the Donald now supports a bill that breaks his promise, but so what?  A win’s a win.

The latest manifestation of the Trump doctrine is his handling of Russian tampering with the election that put him in charge. At first Trump denied there was any tampering or collusion. Then he admitted there may have been tampering by parties unknown, but he sure knew nothing about it. Then he fired his security guy for palling around with Russians during the election, but he was assuredly a lone wolf. Then, most recently, when it came to light that his top three campaign people met with Russian operatives during the campaign, he defaulted to his doctrine: yeah, they may have “technically” colluded, but hey it’s a good thing and, besides, so what?

Trump gets caught on tape admitting to sexual harassment and assault, but it’s just locker room talk – hence, so what?

The Donald claims his security guy, General Flynn, got his clearance from the Obama administration, but it’s just BS. In fact Obama fired Flynn, but so what?

Trump loudly proclaimed that all new pipelines coming into this country from now on would only use American steel. Then he granted a waiver to the Keystone pipeline to, get this, use Russian steel. But, hey, so what comrade?

Blah, blah, blah… The list of Trump bullshit that’s ultimately rationalized with an executive “So what” is huge. Googling “Trump lies” yields 68 million results.

But, so what?  We’ve come to expect this behavior from the Donald and with expectation comes acceptance. Accordingly, his doctrine will continue until we respond to “So what” with “We’re putting your lying ass in jail, that’s what”.

Trump’s lied to us so often over the last two-hundred-fifty-one days that the republic now gratefully accepts “so what”. Hell it’s the only honest thing he says.

Lock him up,